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As a parent of a child involved in youth sports, it’s likely that you have probably noticed how serious and intense many leagues can be like today. In fact, many parents have told me that they sometimes feel as though they are watching mini-professional athletes playing to win at all cost, instead of seeing kids learning, growing, and maturing through the athletic experience. As the emphasis on winning continues to be paramount in many youth sport leagues, it is important we maintain a healthy balance and take time to identify “teachable moments” in sports where kids can learn respect and sportsmanship.

Interestingly, while we often hope for our children to win with grace, lose with dignity, and always display appropriate sportsmanship to teammates and opponents, when we as adults model terribly inappropriate behaviors all of these hopes quickly become diminished. Sportsmanship encompasses far more than begrudgingly shaking an opponents hand after a game, it involves everything you do from the moment you arrive at the park until the time you leave. Sportsmanship is a prosocial behavior that your child can learn through sports, as well as apply to all relationships outside of sports, too.

The following is a list of tips for parents, coaches, and kids to consider so that good competition and mutual respect for one another can occur at the same time.

Parents

• Cheer, don’t jeer! It is very appropriate for you to cheer and encourage your son or daughter while playing sports, but it is never appropriate to make negative remarks to (or about) other kids on the field.

• Control your outbursts. As a sports fan, it is almost impossible to not experience human emotions – including anger and disgust – while watching a game. For some people keeping these emotions inside is not that difficult, but for others it is almost virtually impossible. If you cannot control your emotions, consider alternatives such as sitting further away so as to not disturb others, or in more serious cases, consider talking to a professional

• Model appropriate behaviors. Think about what you say, how you say, and even your body language. Remember, kids see everything and learn from how adults conduct themselves!

Coaches

• Try to encourage kids at all times – even the kids with below average skills. Everyone likes positive reinforcement, so try to keep an eye out for opportunities to praise kids, even if it’s just for their effort.

• Keep your cool when dealing with officials. Oftentimes officials take the brunt of frustration when the games don’t go our way, but most officials get paid almost nothing and are doing their best with the training they have had.

• Look at your opponents as challenges instead of enemies. In fact, talking about the other teams positives can inspire your team to try to improve.

Kids

• Treat all fellow athletes, coaches, and officials with respect. This means playing hard but playing fair, and when things don’t work out in your favor be sure to learn healthy ways to deal with the negative consequences rather than becoming angry, upset and letting yourself get out of control

• Find opportunities to pick one another up and offer praise and encouragement to teammates. Sometimes hearing a compliment from a fellow teammate can be even better than getting one from the coach!

• Show your appreciation to all the people who make your athletic experience special! Be creative and be sure to say “thanks” to your parents, coaches, and officials for all the hard work they put into making your league a fun and exciting place to be!

Dr. Christopher Stankovich is a national expert in the field of sport performance science, and offers educational products and services designed to help kids, coaches and entire athletic organizations maximize the athletic experience. For more information please visit www.drstankovich.com

27th Annual Siesta Key sprint triathlon & duathlon. Come race on Siesta Beach ranked 2nd in America’s Most Beautiful Beaches for 2009. The race is well known for a terrific post race party featuring the hospitality of the Sarasota Sharks Swim Team and outstanding volunteer support to cheer you on to your best finish. The race benefits the YMCA Sharks Swim Program which has consistently coached all levels of swimmers from beginners to Olympians since 1961. The race is on Sunday, October 03, 2010 @ 7:30 AM. For more information or to register go to Active.com

Boys & Girls Clubs of America created a special day, called “Day for Kids,” to foster stronger relationships between adults and children by educating them on the importance and value of spending meaningful time together.  Day for Kids provides the opportunity for every adult to take a break, celebrate and renew their commitement to children.

DAYS FOR KIDS
Please join us for “Day for Kids” on Saturday, September 25th as the Boys & Girls Clubs of Sarasota County celebrate the importance of kids and the adults who care about them with “Walk for the Kids.” Hundreds of adults and children from our communities will gather together at four Boys & Girls Club locations throughout Sarasota County to walk, talk, share a moment, create a memory and make a kid’s day.

WALK FOR KIDS
As part of Day for Kids, Walk for the Kids is friends asking friends and family to rally for kids and support life-enhancing programs of the Boys & Girls Clubs of Sarasota County. The entry fee for the walk is $25 and free for children under 18 years old.
With just a click of a button, you can join as an individual walker or start a team.  A team can be a Family Team including family, friends and neighbors or a Corporate Team–an easy and fun team-building event for a department or group of colleagues.
Simply by asking 10 friends to sponsor you for $25, you can easily reach your first goal of $250. Ask more people ? raise more money! It?s as simple as that!
Be a BGC Star Walker! When registering as a Walker be sure to mark the box indicating that you would like to join the “BGC Star Walkers Club” and set a goal of raising $1,000 or more.  Members of the “BGC Star Walkers Club” receive special benefits and rewards.
The mission of the Boys & Girls Clubs of Sarasota County is to enable all young people, especially those who need us most, to reach their full potential as productive, caring, responsible citizens.

REGISTER TODAY AND MAKE A DIFFERENCE IN THE LIFE OF A CHILD!

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As a sports-parent, you are already aware of the time commitment that is often necessary when it comes to your child and his or her team responsibilities. Today’s youth sport leagues often involve many practices and games, long travel, and sometimes even year-round responsibilities. Needless to say, many parents find it very challenging to keep up with everything that youth sport entails! Having said that, it is vitally important that you make family decisions when it comes to youth sport participation commitments that allow your child – and you – to stay as fully involved as possible so that your child can gain the most from the youth sport experience.

One comment I regularly hear from coaches when I do coach seminars is the discouragement they experience when it appears as though parents are not interested in watching their child compete in sports, but instead regularly drop the child off to practices and games and rarely stick around to watch what is happening! Using their words, some coaches have told me they feel as though some parents use sports as a babysitter for their child to provide a respite during the day so they can do other things without having to provide adequate supervision. Obviously this does not apply to all parents, but I have heard the concern enough over the years to merit it being mentioned in this column.

If you are a parent and are considering having your child sign up for a sports team, please consider the following:

· Determine how time-intensive the league will be and sit down as a family to see if it makes sense to join. Should your child play in an advanced league with more practices, games, and travel; or should he or she play in a recreational league with more relaxed requirements?

· Once you have decided on a league, try to find out as early as possible what your child’s schedule will be like when the season starts. You may want to consider developing a spreadsheet or some kind of schedule that will allow you to adequately plan to watch your child compete.

· Remember, in order for your child to grow holistically and get the most out of his or her athletic experience it is essential that you be a part of the process! In my experience working with young athletes I can say there is nothing more exciting for a young person than to have made a great play and looked up into the stands to see his or her parents beaming with enormous pride and excitement! On the other hand, a big bummer for kids is when they finish playing a great game and realize their parents didn’t see any of their efforts and accomplishments.

· In some instances parents are over-extended with their careers and find it incredibly difficult to make many of their child’s games and are left in a quandary about what to do. In situations like this you may want to consider checking into things like flextime at work, talking to your employer about shifting your work hours, or working your travel schedule around your child’s sports seasons, if possible.

Being an integral part of your child’s sport experience is a big deal, even if it is a challenge to do. It may not be easy to make all the games, but try to make as many as possible and watch how your child grows as a person through the sport experience. One thing is certain: Your child will cherish seeing you at as many games as possible!

Dr. Christopher Stankovich is a national expert in the field of sport performance science, and offers educational products and services designed to help kids, coaches and entire athletic organizations maximize the athletic experience. For more information please visit www.drstankovich.com

Its time for our annual Fantasy Football League to start. If you are interested, we are playing. If you would like to own a team in our league, email info@sportsfamilymag.com and instructions will be emailed to you. Last years winner won a PING Driver that we pulled out of the prize closet. This year the closet is full of good stuff and the winner of the league will get to choose anything out of the prize closet they want. The deadline for all team requests is September 5th.

Your invited you to The Manatee High School Kickoff Classic on Friday evening, August 27th as we take on Plant High School.  Kick-off is at 7pm and ESPN will be televising the game.  Don’t miss the excitement as the ‘Canes make their season debut on national television!

Come out early and join the cheerleaders as they host the 3rd annual Tailgate Party featuring delicious barbeque (from Lee Roy Selmons), entertainment and a pre-game pep rally to get fans fired up!

So mark your calendars for the Kick Off Classic on August 27th and join the pre-game Tailgate party starting at 4:30pm.

Tailgate Tickets are $10 and can be purchased from your favorite MHS cheerleader.

For more information visit the schools website. Manatee Hurricaines

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Have you ever stopped and wondered whatever happened to the three-sport letter winner?? In the “old” days of athletics only just a few years ago, many young athletes successfully played multiple sports, leading to the achievement of earning multiple varsity letters in high school. Interestingly, a new trend has emerged today where the multiple varsity letter winner has become an image of the past, and instead been replaced with increasingly more kids specializing and playing only one sport.

Whether you like it or not, families today are faced with tough choices that often begin at a very early age - including questions around how early to allow a child to begin playing organized sports, what skill level to compete, and whether or not the child should dedicate all of his or her efforts toward one sport instead sampling several different sports throughout the year. It is the last concern, sport specialization, which I would like to explore in this months article.

As with just about every venture in life, the more you do something, the more skilled you are likely to become. Sport specialization allows children to play their chosen sport more frequently, and for longer periods of time, often resulting in faster and more advanced skill development. While the net result of how much a child specializing in one sport improves compared to other children playing multiple sports is certainly debatable, in most cases the child who specializes does advance with skill acquisition at a faster pace when compared to other children who do not specialize in one sport.

A few advantages of sport specialization include:

• more games and practices;

• different competition from diverse backgrounds and geographic regions;

• greater diversity in coaching;

• greater exposure to junior high, high school, and sometimes even college coaches;

• more opportunities to review and refine athletic skills so that they can become mastered at an earlier age.

On the other hand, sport specialization can also come with a cost. Probably the biggest concern with sport specialization is the increased risk for burnout and withdrawal, often resulting in poor coping skills in response to the increased pressure and stress. Keep in mind that the number one reason kids play sports is to have fun, and in cases of sport specialization, it is easy to see that the enormous amount of time and energy devoted to one sport can easily offset the fun and instead make the sport look more like a job and a lot less like a recreational activity. Other tradeoffs with sport specialization include:

• difficulties balancing the sport with school and other activities and social responsibilities;

• missing critical periods to develop skills needed for other sports should your child want to try different sports later;

• missing an opportunity to identify hidden talents your child might have for another sport;

• being required to spend enormous amounts of time committed to your child’s sport schedule – often resulting in altered or missed family vacations.

Interestingly, some coaches think sport specialization actually hinders athletic development, and that kids would be far better off sampling several different sports throughout the year. The thinking is that different sports develop different skills, muscles, and abilities, all leading the child to become a better, more complete.

It is becoming common knowledge that kids who specialize in one sport early in life often end up having the inside track when it comes time to competing in junior high and high school. Still, it is vitally important that you think the decision of sport specialization through before making such a commitment.

Dr. Christopher Stankovich is a national expert in the field of sport performance science, and offers educational products and services designed to help kids, coaches and entire athletic organizations maximize the athletic experience. For more information please visit www.drstankovich.com

Dear Parent of a Little Leaguer:

I’m an umpire. I don’t do it for a living, but only on Saturdays and Sundays for fun. I’ve played the game, coached it and watched it. But somehow, nothing takes the place of umpiring. Maybe it’s because I feel that deep down I’m providing a fair chance for all the kids to play the game without disagreements and arguments.

With all the fun I’ve had, there is still something that bothers me about my job. Some of you folks don’t understand why I’m here. Some of you feel I’m there to exert authority over your son. For that reason, you often yell at me when I make a mistake, or encourage your son to say things that hurt my feelings. How many of you really understand that I try to be perfect? I try not to make a mistake. I don’t want your son to feel he got a bad deal from an umpire. Yet no matter how hard I try, I can’t be perfect. I counted the number of calls I made in a six-inning game today. The total number of decisions, whether on balls and strikes or safe and outs, was 146. I tried my best to get them all right, but I’m sure I missed some. When I figured out my percentage on paper, I could have missed eight calls today and still gotten about 95 percent of the calls right.

In most occupations that percentage would be considered excellent. If I were in school, that grade would receive an “A” for sure. But your demands are higher than that. Let me tell you more about my game today. There was one real close call that ended the game. A runner for the home team was trying to steal the plate on a passed ball. The catcher chased the ball down and threw to the pitcher covering the plate. The pitcher made the tag and I called the runner out. As I was getting my equipment to leave, I overheard one of the parents comment, “It’s too bad the kids have to lose games because of rotten umpires. That was one of the lousiest calls I’ve ever seen.” Later, at the concession stand, a couple of kids were telling their friends, “Boy, the umpires were lousy today. They lost the game for us.” I felt just terrible when I got home. Here was a group of kids who had made a lot of mistakes which had cost them a number of runs.

The purpose of Little League is to teach baseball skills to young men. Obviously, a team which does not play well in a given game, yet is given the opportunity to blame that loss on an umpire for one call or two, is being given the chance to take all responsibility for the loss from their shoulders. A parent or adult leader who permits the younger player to blame his failures on an umpire, regardless of the quality of that umpire, is doing the worst kind of injustice to that youngster. Rather than learning responsibility, such an attitude is fostering an improper outlook toward the ideals of the game itself. This irresponsibility is bound to carry over to future years.

As I sit here writing this letter, I am no longer as upset as I was this afternoon, I wanted to quit umpiring, but fortunately, my wife reminded me of another situation that occurred last week. I was umpiring behind the plate for a pitcher who pantomimed his displeasure at any call on a borderline pitch that was not in his team’s favour. One could sense that he wanted the crowd to realise that he was a fine, talented player who was doing his best to get along, but that I was a black-hearted villain who was working against him. The kid continued acting like this for two innings, while at the same time yelling at his own players, who dared to make a mistake. For two innings the manager watched this. When the kid returned to the dugout to bat in the top of the third, the manager called him aside. In a voice loud enough that I was able to overhear, the lecture went like this: “Listen son, it is time you made a decision. You can be an umpire, an actor, or a pitcher. But you can only be one at a time when you are playing for me. Right now it is your job to pitch. And, you are basically doing a lousy job. Leave the acting to actors, the umpiring to the umpires, or you won’t do any pitching here. Now what is it going to be?”

Needless to say, the kid chose the pitching route and went on to win the game. When the game was over the kid followed me to my car. Fighting his hardest to keep back the tears he apologized for his actions and thanked me for umpiring his game. He said he had learned a lesson that he would never forget.

I can’t help but wonder how many more fine young men are missing their chance to develop into outstanding ball players because their parents encourage them to spend time umpiring.

The following morning Donald Jensen died of a brain concussion.

This story is taken from A 3rd Serving of Chicken Soup for the Soul: 101 More Stories to Open the Heart and Rekindle the Spirit.